Napkins In a
restaurant:
As soon as you are seated, remove the napkin from your place setting,
unfold it, and put it in your lap. Do not shake it open. At some
very formal restaurants, the waiter may do this for the diners,
but it is not inappropriate to place your own napkin in your lap,
even when this is the case.
The
napkin rests on the lap till the end of the meal. Don't clean the
cutlery or wipe your face with the napkin. NEVER use it to wipe
your nose!
If
you excuse yourself from the table, loosely fold the napkin and
place it to the left or right of your plate. Do not refold your
napkin or wad it up on the table either. Never place your napkin
on your chair.
At
the end of the meal, leave the napkin semi-folded at the left side
of the place setting. It should not be crumpled or twisted; nor
should it be folded. The napkin must also not be left on the chair.
Private
dinner party:
The
meal begins when the host or hostess unfolds his or her napkin.
This is your signal to do the same. Place your napkin on your lap,
completely unfolded if it is a small luncheon napkin or in half,
lengthwise, if it is a large dinner napkin. Do not shake it open.
The
napkin rests on the lap till the end of the meal. Place the napkin
in loose folds to the left of your plate.
The
host will signal the end of the meal by placing his or her napkin
on the table. Once the meal is over, you too should place your napkin
neatly on the table to the left of your dinner plate. (Do not refold
your napkin, but don't wad it up, either.)
When
to eat In a
restaurant:
Wait
until all are served before beginning to eat.
At a private dinner party:
When
your host or hostess picks up their fork to eat, then you may eat.
Do not start before this unless the host or hostess insists that
you start eating.
Use
the silverware farthest from your plate first.
Here's
the rule:
Eat
to your left, drink to your right. Any food dish to the left is
yours, and any glass to the right is yours.
Starting
with the knife, fork, or spoon that is farthest from your plate,
work your way in, using one utensil for each course. The salad fork
is on your outermost left, followed by your dinner fork. Your soup
spoon is on your outermost right, followed by your beverage spoon,
salad knife and dinner knife. Your dessert spoon and fork are above
your plate or brought out with dessert. If you remember the rule
to work from the outside in, you'll be fine.
Use
one of two methods when using the fork and knife:
American
Style: Knife in right hand, fork in left hand holding food. After
a few bite-sized pieces of food are cut, place knife on edge of
plate with blades facing in. Eat food by switching fork to right
hand (unless you are left handed).
Continental/European
Style: Knife in right hand, fork in left hand. Eat food with fork
still in left hand. The difference is that you don't switch hands-you
eat with your fork in your left hand, with the prongs curving downward.
Once
used, your utensils, including the handles, should not touch the
table again. Always rest forks, knives, and spoons on the side of
your plate or in the bowl.
For
more formal dinners, from course to course, your tableware will
be taken away and replaced as needed.
To
signal that your are done with the course, rest your fork, tines
up, and knife blade in, with the handles resting at five o'clock
an tips pointing to ten o'clock on your plate. Any unused silverware
is simply left on the table.
General
rules
Arrive
at least 10 minutes early unless otherwise specified.
Pass
food from the left to the right.
Always
say please when asking for something. Be sure to say thank you to
your server and bus boy after they have removed any used items.
If
asked for the salt or pepper, pass both together, even if a table
mate asks for only one of them. This is so dinner guests won't have
to search for orphaned shakers.
Set
any passed item, whether it's the salt and pepper shakers, a bread
basket, or a butter plate, directly on the table instead of passing
hand-to-hand.
Never
intercept a pass. Snagging a roll out of the breadbasket or taking
a shake of salt when it is en route to someone else is a no-no.
Food
is served from the left. Dishes are removed from the right.
Butter,
spreads, or dips should be transferred from the serving dish to
your plate before spreading or eating.
Never
turn a wine glass upside down to decline wine. It is more polite
to let the wine be poured and not draw attention. Otherwise, hold
your hand over the wine glass to signal that you don't want any
wine.
Always
scoop food away from you.
Taste
your food before seasoning it.
Do
try a little of everything on your plate.
Don't
blow on your food to cool it off. If it is too hot to eat, take
the hint and wait.
Keep
elbows off the table. Keep your left hand in your lap unless you
are using it.
Do
not talk with your mouth full. Chew with your mouth closed.
Cut
only enough food for the next mouthful. Eat in small bites and slowly.
Don't
clean up spills with your own napkin and don't touch items that
have dropped on the floor. You can use your napkin to protect yourself
from spills. Then, simply and politely ask your server to clean
up and to bring you a replacement for the soiled napkin or dirty
utensil.
Do
not blow your nose at the dinner table. Excuse yourself to visit
the restroom. Wash your hands before returning to the dining room.
If you cough, cover your mouth with your napkin to stop the spread
of germs and muffle the noise. If your cough becomes unmanageable,
excuse yourself to visit the restroom. Wash your hands before returning
to the dining room.
Turn
off your cell phone or switch it to silent or vibrate mode before
sitting down to eat, and leave it in your pocket or purse. It is
impolite to answer a phone during dinner. If you must make or take
a call, excuse yourself from the table and step outside of the restaurant.
Do
not use a toothpick or apply makeup at the table.
Whenever
a woman leaves the table or returns to sit, all men seated with
her should stand up.
Do
not push your dishes away from you or stack them for the waiter
when you are finished. Leave plates and glasses where they are.
Tipping
etiquette
At
a restaurant, always leave a tip. Tips can vary from 15% to 25%.
Waiter: 15%
to 20% of the bill; 25% for extraordinary service
Wine steward:
15% of wine bill
Bartender: 10%
– 15% of bar bill
Coat check:
$1.00 per coat
Car attendant:
$1.00 - $2.00
Remember that the amount you tip reflects the total price before
any coupons, gift certificates, etc. Just because you get a discount,
does not mean that your server did not serve up the full order.
If
the owner of the restaurant serves you himself, you should still
tip him. He will divide the tip among those who work in the kitchen
and dining room.
